Five Guys

240 Main St. White Plains, NY 10601 • (914) 422-3483 • fiveguys.com

FiveGuys

Dear 5 Guys,

Lose the peanuts and spend the money on shakes. What kind of burger joint doesn’t have shakes? It’d be like a raw bar serving up shrimp cocktail without cocktail sauce!

That MAJOR gripe aside, the burgers themselves are pretty good. In fact, a lot of East Coasters even claim them to be the In n’ Out Burger of the East. Granted most of those East Coasters are either delusional or simply mind-fucking themselves into believing it, but even with all the wishful thinking in the world, comparing them to the likes of In n’ Out is a VERY generous bridge too far. I mean sure, it’s great that the burgers are better than Burger King, and I’m even happy to give 5 guys the upper hand when it comes to their fries (light years better than the cardboard crap at In n’ Out), but I’d take a Double Double Animal Style any day over 5 Guys. Which brings me to my second major gripe, I don’t like burger places without a point of view. As Ego would say in the movie Ratatouille, “give me some perspective.” I hate “make your own burger” places. If I wanted to make my own burger I would’ve done it AT HOME! I came to you because I just wanted to pick out something interesting off of a menu. Ideally a combination of things that I wouldn’t have thought of.

So, with these two major dings going against it, 5 Guys is definitely not getting 5 Knives.

3 teeth

Elevation Burger

228 Market St. Yonkers, NY 10710(914) 358-9400elevationburger.com

20101123-elevationburger

I guess I’m not a “build your own burger” lover. I mean, isn’t part of what makes a restaurant great a point of view? Inventiveness? Show me what YOU can do. I know I can stick a ton of shit on a bun to suit my own palate. But when I walk into a restaurant I don’t want what I would do. I want what YOU would do. “Perspective” as Ego from Ratatouille would say.

So, Elevation scored zero points for me on the menu, per the rant above (shocker), but what about the quality of ingredients? They’re just okay. I honestly can’t say they’re any better than Shake Shack or 5 Guys or In and Out or BGR or Westchester Burger Co. And at least most of those guys bring something new to the party with an inventive burger or two… or ten.

But, with all of that said, if you happen to already be at Ridge Hill and you are jonesing for a burger, Elevation will do. Just don’t make a special trip and keep your expectations… less elevated.

2 teeth